when i grow up, i want to be a?!?!

NO IDEA! I do not have the answer to this, and in this moment it is driving. me. mad.

I know, I know, many people don’t know what they want to be when they grow up or they change their mind several times throughout life . . . but I do not like that, I don’t like not knowing. I guess this is yet another twist in my current season, learning to be okay with the unknown. 🤷🏼‍♀️ With not knowing what I want to be, do, etc. it means I cannot plan the future out and I’m typically a BIG planner. I mean I have a phone calendar, a purse planner, and a calendar hanging on the fridge . . . can’t forget anything and no one can say they didn’t know if it’s on the calendar. 😛

I’ve taken quiz after quiz and assessment after assessment trying to get some guidance. Why? I don’t know. No test is going to say, ‘you should be a (blank)’ and then I will be like, OH, YES, THAT is what I’ve been waiting to hear and that’s what I am going to do. No, it’s not going to work like that. Although that would be nice, no lie.

I can tell you what I do NOT want to be. I do not want to be working myself mad, I do not want to give myself to a company that is willing/able/capable of replacing me in the blink of an eye. I want to be valued, appreciated, needed and wanted (shit, I need that in a relationship too😂)! I want to be happy. Yes, money is needed to pay my bills but I am perfectly okay not making ‘the big bucks’ because I truly, TRULY believe that happiness comes from within. It’s what I am doing, who I am with, and my own personal attitude and desires in life that make me happy and will continue to make me happy.

Now that you know that – what should I be? What’s your suggestion? A recent test I just took this morning said I should be working with people:

Sure, getting a big paycheck is great, but you’re probably going to shine brightest while you’re helping other people out.


DUH. I know this . . . so I hit the next button, to find out my next career move. I should be making people happy it said . . .

The change you’d like to see in the world is a lot more happiness to go around, right? So besides putting a smile on someone’s face, you’d definitely also like to be well rewarded and respected in the long run. You’d probably thrive in an environment where you’d get to interact with a wide variety of people every day, face challenges, and leave the world a better (or at least more organized or pleasant) place than you found it. 


I mean, I really want to say DUH again, I feel like they could have avoided the 2nd 18 question quiz and just told me this in the first one, but whatever, I clicked the damn next button again . . . and you know what it told me I should be? I died. ☠️ Really. A bartender. I mean . . .

Bartenders don’t just mix drinks. They are waiters, entertainers, chemists, janitors, and sometimes social workers. They face the thirstiest people in the world with only a few feet of bar to protect them, armed only with some bottles and glasses. To succeed, you’ll need to be friendly, organized, and have a killer memory. Does that sound like you? We thought so. Bartending challenges the mind, the body, and the social skills like no other career.


It’s got some points, I just don’t think my FULL potential could be put to work there, maybe I’m wrong . . . maybe I’ve found my calling after all.

Either way no test or quiz or assessment is going to tell me what I don’t already know. I’m a high D/I (dominance and influence) and recently have transitioned to have a bit more in the S/C (steadiness and compliance) roles but not much . . .what can I say? I’m dominant and if you don’t like it, I will convince you that you should! But at the end of the day I have to be content with where I am being guided and trust that it’s in the right direction.

Making the wrong move is the hardest thing. I am loving being home, getting things done, running errands, I’m more available for the kids, I can volunteer through church more, I can just be PRESENT and that is what I want in everything. I don’t want to miss practices, games, cuddle moments, or time with my friends and Heather time – all of those things are so much more important to me than a corporate job that doesn’t like my tattoos or desire to wear leggings even if they paid me the big bucks!

So in short – here I am. Recently looking at part-time jobs, work from home jobs – jobs that can afford me what I need and then the availability I want . . . and well, we’ll see what happens!

Hold on tight!


Author: Heather Musick

Mother of 2 going through life one day at a time . . .

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s